Where you can find me now:


As the new title suggests, this blog will focus on my grad school stuff, but as fitness is very much still a part of my life, I will be posting about that as well. :]

Again, let me say - I really do miss you guys. <3

Wow. I still have over 1000 followers on this blog.

I just wanted to let you know that I am still on Tumblr, still working out, still recovering. If you are interested in seeing what I am up to, I will post my new tumblr URL - it’s not solely fitness-related, but I feel like I am capable of blogging about my fitness now in a way that’s not unhealthy. If no one is interested, then it’s whatever. I just wanted to check on this blog since I hadn’t in over a month.

I hope everyone is doing alright. I really do miss you guys and this community.

My Plan/Ideas.

I still haven’t really found the words, I think, but I need to write this now. It’s been weighing on my mind all day.

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I think I have figured out what I need to do in order to be happy again.

And I don’t particularly like what that is. :/

But I know that I am making the right decision and that this is what I need if I ever want to be happy again, and especially if I want to be happier now.

I need to collect my thoughts before I can articulate what this means. I’ll make a post tonight detailing my plans/ideas.



If you look at this, and just think, for like 20 seconds, it’s truly amazing. This is one of my favorite .gif series now. I love it.

I know I said I’d reblog the HP stuff on the other blog, but this is totally fitblr related with the running.

So awesome!

The Spartan Warrior: Fitblr Meet Up @ ACL - Austin, TX


What say you?

I’m thinking of heading up a Fitblr meetup in Austin, TX during Austin City Limits, September 16-18. It gives you all something to do while meeting up with the other Fitblrs.

What I need first is a badass invitation annoucement. Some of you must be graphic…

YES. A meet-up I can actually make it to! I am so down, and have been dying for an excuse to hit up ACL. So excited!

Thank you to everyone who responded to my post yesterday!

I just cleared out my ask box full of support and understanding. You guys really are making a huge, positive difference in this process, and I cannot tell you how much I appreciate it. :]

We won our first game last night! :D 3-0, one point of which was MINE. Unfortunately, we had a second game not even an hour later, and we lost 0-7 (they were the number one team in the division, half of their team are semi-pro, blah blah, so I think we held our own really well). My body is basically dead today, though, so I am going to keep my workout light - maybe a little hooping, ab work, MAYBE a bike ride, and some yoga/stretching.

I have an appointment set up with my nutritionist for a week from tomorrow. She wants me to bring in all my food logs (!) and wants me to keep very detailed logs from now until then. Writing down times, how I feel, any stomach upset, etc. Yay for getting to be a little more obsessive! :/

I am really going to push to be more positive today. Going to force myself to sit down without TV or Tumblr and write for a while. If I work out at all, it’ll be this afternoon.

What do you have planned for this Thursday?

Reblog this if




you are a pro-recovery or pro-positivity blog.


i never judge anyone facing an ED or recovery. in fact, i encourage you to “stop by” and check some of my posts to help guide you on your journey. I’ll be here for you if you ever need someone or encouragement.

Pro Pro Pro Pro Pro!

Definitely pro-recovery. I am struggling right now, which means my positivity isn’t at its highest, but I am always here to show support and offer advice to anyone who needs it - ED or otherwise. :)

And I am making some serious changes to be more positive, more often! So stay tuned for that. ;)

Do you ever just get fed up with your life?

Sorry, guys. It’s about to get personal.

I don’t know why I felt the need to post that at the beginning. Because it is my blog, and I can post whatever I want/need on here.


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No Excuses, Just Results: I wish the people I followed posted more text posts. I want to know...


Yep, all of this:


I wish the people I followed posted more text posts. I want to know what you did today. What you accomplished, what you hope to accomplish, what you’re going to do to accomplish it. I want to know about how your family is or how you’re doing in school or at work. I want to know the things about you that friends would know about each other. Because the way I see it, if I follow you, then you’re my friend.

I’m sick of the “top ten foods to burn belly fat” and the pictures of the bodies that you wish you had. Tell me about what you ate today and what you did to get closer to your goal body. That’s what I’d rather read.

Most of the people I follow do this, but I want to make sure you know how much I appreciate/want for you to make those kinds of posts. If I want to know “tips” or want to look at some fitspo (which, btw, I do not EVER really want to look at), I can Google that, or search for it on Tumblr. I can’t Google your daily life when I want to know how you are doing today. Keep this journey, whether you are losing weight, building muscle, or just searching for happiness, about you - who you are, what you are doing, how you are feeling. That’s what I care about, and why I constantly check my dash.

I do want to note that blogs dedicated to tips/fitspo/whatever are TOTALLY OKAY. I don’t think anything is wrong with them, or that they are “bad.” That’s just not the type of thing I want to solely read/see.

Does this make sense?

Okay, so I know online calculators usually can’t be trusted, but there is a huge discrepancy between several online calculators and my HRM’s reading for how much I burn in a given game of indoor soccer.

My first night on the field, I wore my HRM. I was forced to take it off halfway through (watches are not allowed on the field), so I just doubled the reading to get my total for the whole game - 475 x 2 = 950, right? Which made sense to me, because I was basically sprinting the entire game, as I am either a forward or mid. I entered this into my MFP app so I could use it for future reference (and could easily subtract minutes that I subbed out, which hasn’t been more than 2-3 ever).

Well, looking at online calculators (since my Garmin does not track calories burned by HR, but by distance/pace and BW), and they say I should only be burning between 500-600 per game. That’s about half of what my HRM indicated!

So I am wondering - which do I trust? My HRM, which hasn’t failed me to date, an online calculator, which could be skewed (my max HR during the game was somewhere between 188-192), or maybe average the two?

I want to make sure I eat enough, but I don’t want to eat too much (which I am not sure is even possible - I am going to have to eat a LOT today, either way).

Maybe I am just way over-thinking this whole thing. If I could just know when my body has had enough and what it needs more, this wouldn’t such a concern for me.

Anyway, opinions would be greatly appreciated.

Sometimes I look at all the Proana girls and all the girls starving themselves for their diets and I think:


They don’t believe me. But it’s true… it came from Harry Potter.

Listen to Lupin. He knows nutrition. And he would never lie.

So eat - you’ll feel better.

Alright, I need some advice.

I want to carb load today because I have two soccer games tonight. Both are one hour long, back to back, and I know from past experience that I will probably only be subbed out once per game. Each game (previously) has burned nearly 1000 calories - meaning tonight I will burn close to 2000. Meaning I need to eat a shitton of food before and after.

My question is - how do I safely and properly go about carb-loading? I don’t want to eat a lot of crap (though I may let myself have pizza post-game) but I want to make sure I get enough. Any advice?

I feel like this has happened a lot but…

No run tonight.

Came home from therapy/visiting Aunt/picking up my Garmin and laid down for a short nap at 7p, thinking I’d get up at 8. Wrong. Woke up once to tell Paul I wasn’t going to run, and fell back asleep until now (11p). I can barely keep my eyes open as I type this, so I think it’s safe to say that I am taking an extra rest day this week.

Which is just as well since I have a 25K bike scheduled for the AM tomorrow and two soccer games tomorrow night.

Night all. I’ll post intake for today tomorrow (hint: it’s going to be lower than usual because I fell asleep so early).

My Garmin Forerunner is here!

Motivation to work out tonight has been reinstated. :)